Philippians 1:12

“The things which happened to me have actually turned out for the furtherance of the gospel.”

Philippians 1:12

From Dawn’s Journal

I remember them clearly, the long showers after losing Julian. They were filled with despair. I wished the water could get hot enough to melt me so I could disappear with my tears down the drain.

I had lots of thoughts in those showers. Lots of questions. Lots of realizations. Much of my early writing came in those moments. But one particular shower stands out above the rest. God gave me the name The Break of Dawn: Finding Joy in the Mourning.

“Clever, Lord,” I thought. “I like it. And I can get on board with the breaking… but joy in the mourning? I’m not there yet.”

My blog was born out of that moment. But here I am, three years later, and some days I’m still looking for that joy in the mourning God said I would have.

Don’t get me wrong, I have joy. But I wanted joy instead of the mourning.

How, O Lord?

I’ve been studying Philippians this month, and I love this book. It’s the epistle of joy.

Paul gushes with love for the recipients of his letter. It’s hard to read without feeling his affection for them. Then he encourages them by saying, “The things which happened to me have actually turned out for the furtherance of the gospel.”

Wow.

Here he is sitting in chains. His readers were probably grieving for him, wondering why in the world God would allow Paul to be imprisoned when he could be out preaching the gospel if only he were released.

If you’ve lived through a hard story, you know that sometimes you become the comforter after you tell it. I think Paul is doing that here too. He’s reassuring his readers that he’s okay, not because he’s confident he’ll be released or because he’s certain he won’t be martyred, but because neither of those circumstances ultimately matter. He sees the bigger picture.

The furtherance of the gospel.

In fact, he says these things happened to him for the furtherance of the gospel.

Philippians gives us a beautiful picture of what it looks like to have joy in the mourning. It comes from seeing the bigger picture. Paul knew he might die. But even if he did, he knew it would be his gain. Staying was for the good of others.

Do I live my life like that?

Do I see the bigger picture when life’s heavy circumstances surround me? Can I see God working for the good of others through my own suffering?

Prayer

Lord, give me eyes to see Your providential hand at work through every high and every low in my life. May I live in a way that brings light and life to others, not because I am free from affliction, trouble, or sorrow, but because I have joy in the midst of them, knowing that Your plan is unfolding without a hitch and that whether I live or die, Christ will be magnified.